If you haven’t read ‘Why You Need to Write a Bucket List’, here’s a brief summary. A bucket list is a list of things you want to get done — it can be whatever you want.
My bucket list includes things like completing a triathlon and watching the Harry Potter series from beginning to end…
It’s not about getting things done before you expire, but rather a fun way to invigorate life at an age when things might be stalling. A bucket list helps us live with reason and purpose, get excited about things, challenge ourselves, build new relationships and strengthen current ones.
There are no hard and fast rules; however, here’s a guide to get you started. So, if you want to feel better, find purpose and enjoy life more, read on.
Step 1: Write, scribble or type for 20 minutes without judgement
A simple start. I personally like to use a notebook — everything goes in there when I’m trying to come up with new ideas. I like the creative side of writing with a fountain pen.
Using pen and paper can help generate ideas, and be a useful tool for creativity. It also has many other benefits.
This feels more like a creative process to me, but if you prefer to get things down in a document or scribble on a tablet, then do that.
Whichever method gets your thoughts flowing is great. Do this for about 20 minutes, then have a break and you’ll find that a load of ideas just come to you. Develop this list over a couple of days or weeks.
Step 2: Organise and prioritise your ideas. Be flexible and open-minded
To get anything done, I need to organise and prioritise my ideas. Otherwise, what’s scribbled in my notebook remains a load of random nonsense, which makes little sense to me days later.
You can categorise your bucket list however you like. I like to get rid of the impossible first. Realistically, was I ever going to go to space? Or run the fastest ever marathon?
So be practical and remove the things you will never realistically be able to do. But don’t be too harsh — we can still have dreams in midlife.
Now is the time to identify your timeframe and think about how many things you want on your list. My “40 Things Before 40” bucket list was written when I was 37, so it was reasonably challenging to get everything done.
But done they were — mainly through commitment and being flexible with what could be adapted within the timeframe.
For example, I wanted to travel on a canal barge. This developed from staying on a barge for a week to being a passenger on one. The watered-down version achieved my aim, was better time-wise and my finances took less of a hit.
Step 3: Reflect, discuss and ponder – time to start getting excited
Is that excitement you feel? Probably. The thought of doing new things and stretching ourselves can really motivate and invigorate us.
But reflection is valuable. It’s time to start asking yourself questions. Read your list and ask yourself honestly:
Is this something I want to achieve for myself or for others?
Often we do things because we feel pressure to satisfy or impress others. This should be a positive pursuit to make you happier — not them.
Will attempting this cause negative consequences?
I only add things to my list that I know will make me stronger, happier and healthier, while requiring a little sacrifice. One example from my ‘40 Before 40’ was experiencing an expensive whisky. It was a one-off, but an enjoyable experience.
If my challenge had been to down a bottle of whisky in one go — well, we can see the problem with that. Not something anybody should try.
Is this too much of a compromise?
Is it challenging enough, or am I taking the easy path?
I wanted to complete a triathlon. I had time to train and a good fitness base, so completing a short triathlon wouldn’t have been enough of a challenge.
So I opted for a half Ironman. It pushed me, but it was ultimately achieved. The sense of achievement was far greater than if I had chosen the easier option.
But for me, that challenge was important. You may value something entirely different.
Does this fit with who I am?
When we reach midlife, we tend to have a clearer sense of self than we did in our 20s and 30s.
If something on your list makes you question whether it’s a bad idea, it probably is. I’m not talking about things like wanting to try rock climbing — done with a trained instructor, it can be very safe.
I’m referring to those things you instinctively know are wrong, and which could jeopardise your future happiness, mental health or physical wellbeing.
Did you know?
People who pursue meaningful goals, which are personal to them, tend to experience greater happiness and overall wellbeing.
Step 4: Make them specific and add a deadline for success
Once you’ve established your list and reflected on it, the fun part can begin — the planning stage. Once you know exactly what you want to do, prioritise it and give it a deadline.
Here’s an example, “handle a tarantula”, which I had on my list:
- Do I really want to do this? Yes.
- Where can I do this? A local safari park had an arachnid and insect experience day.
- I booked a date, paid for it and committed myself.
No deadline, no action — something I discovered many times. This challenge could easily have been postponed forever.
Another trick I discovered was that if I booked and paid upfront, it got done because I had committed myself.
Accountability partners can also be powerful — especially if it’s something someone else wants to achieve too.
Step 5: Enjoy and celebrate – even failure fuels positive change
The most important step is to enjoy the process and embrace the experience. Yes, some of the things on your list may be challenging, but throw yourself into them and get excited.
If you happen to fail at a task — for example, a fear you wanted to overcome — don’t let it get you down. It was on your list, and if you gave it your best effort, well done. Celebrate the courage it took. Also always learn from your mistakes, there’s a valuable lesson hiding within the disappointment.
We must remain flexible. Challenge is healthy, but fearing a task or striving for perfection can be harmful. We are aiming for life-enhancing experiences — a fine line that most of us navigate better as we gain life experience.
So, to summarise…
A bucket list isn’t about ticking boxes or impressing anyone else. It’s about intention and living deliberately. Life can quickly become routine, and without something to look forward to, days blur into weeks and years.
A thoughtfully created bucket list interrupts this. It gives us direction, purpose and excitement. It helps us recognise what truly matters and encourages us to live with greater enthusiasm.
So don’t wait. Grab a notebook, set a timer for 20 minutes and start today. Share your list with a friend. Set deadlines. Your future self will thank you for taking action now.
What will you put on your bucket list today?