Forty-plus years of experiences, hitting midlife and thinking — what now?
A so-called “midlife crisis” happens because we know it’s time for change. An empty nest, career or relationships stagnating, and both mental and physical changes.
Then there’s the stereotype — the downward spiral of getting older. Society treating us differently, and sabotaging our own thoughts and actions. Something I frequently noticed as soon as I hit 45.
So how do we start?
A bucket list.
A great way to revitalise life and push us to try new experiences.
Yes, it has negative connotations. But it’s a useful tool for personal growth, motivation, and living with purpose. Plus it’s good fun. Here’s a few reasons why you should start now.
Why Write a Bucket List in Midlife?
1. It Keeps You Motivated and Interested in Life
We get lost in the day-to-day grind of life. It becomes repetitive — wake up, work, sleep, repeat.
There’s so much routine and responsibility, little time is left for new experiences. Things that bring excitement, meaning, and purpose.
Creating a bucket list reminds us that we have things we want to do. Dreams and ambitions that had been forgotten or put on hold.
2. It Reminds You Who You Really Are
When I hit 40, I was positive about staying fit. However, injuries and niggles made me feel older than I was, which affected my mindset.
I’d always enjoyed physical challenges but started to wonder if I was getting too old.
Then I thought, what have I got to lose?
So, I added “complete a triathlon” to my 50 things before 50 list.
When I completed the triathlon, I had no doubt I was capable. Not only was I fitter, but I was also in a far more positive mental state.
And being exposed to a new experience helped me break a stereotype. When looking at the winners list all the male winners were in the 50 plus category.
Sometimes we just need proof that we’re still able and capable to do the unknown.
3. It Builds Resilience and Re-energises You
New experiences which push us out of our comfort zone build resilience. A habit of pushing beyond what feels safe or familiar re-energises us.
For example, I want to do the longest zip line in Wales — something I’m honestly dreading. But I know it will also be fun and fulfilling.
There will be things on your bucket list which are in your comfort zone, but these are still important. Experience taught me not to only stive to complete extravagant, uncomfortable things. Because doing this was unenjoyable and I found that I wasn’t achieving enough.
It needs to be both achievable and challenging, but more about this another time.
4. It Strengthens and Builds Relationships
A bucket list is an amazing way to meet new people, reconnect with old friends, or reinvigorate existing relationships.
One of my earlier challenges was to watch the entire box set of a well-known wizard movie series — the one based around a school.
It had always been one of my partner’s favourites, but I’d never really engaged with it. However, we watched it together, and now it’s become a family tradition every Christmas.
Experiences create connections, you may hit it off with people who you had zero in common with. Engaging in something which someone else is also passionate about can create common ground. Which may result in the nurturing of a great relationship.
Also, imagine the Monday morning conversation at work when someone asks what you did at the weekend, and you casually mention you did a skydive.
These experiences can create an instant conversation starter, no matter how exciting or mundane they appear.
5. It Provides a Powerful Sense of Purpose
When was the last time you got out of bed feeling real drive and purpose?
Life can feel repetitive, wake, work, sleep, repeat. Having something to look forward to shakes up the mundane and invigorates daily life.
I’ve always exercised and always will because I understand the benefits. But even I hit plateaus.
Boredom sets in. The gym becomes routine. Then I found a local triathlon, something I’d never done before, but I threw myself into it.
It gave me purpose. It pushed me harder. It reignited my motivation, and will forever be something I’m proud of achieving.
As we age, novelty and excitement become rarer, so we must make a conscious effort to create it ourselves.
Start Your Bucket List Now — Don’t Wait
Grab a pen and paper and start writing your list today. You won’t regret it.
I’ve been progressing with my 50 before 50 list and making steady progress, it helps me fill the void, which is sometimes an inevitable part of all our lives.
A bucket list isn’t set in stone, it’s constantly evolving and adapting. And that’s the beauty of it.
Be bold or be conservative, the important thing is to experience the benefits we’ve discussed.
Because midlife isn’t the beginning of the end. It’s time to start living more intentionally. If you’re in midlife and feeling stuck, creating a bucket list could be the spark you need.
Writing my own bucket list reminded me that life isn’t slowing down, it’s just changing direction.